source photo: https://rabaah.com/

By Kabakura Jean  Bosco Ceusi

Orgasm is the peak of sexual arousal, which culminates into ejaculation in men. Therefore, men or even their sexual partners may be aware it has happened. Only a few women ejaculate fluid at orgasm with yet a few others getting intense feelings of sexual release and warmth but this differs from woman to woman. 

It may therefore be difficult for a woman to know that she has reached orgasm.

Since women’s experiences with orgasm are more varied than men, and not all women experience orgasm in the same way. Some women not feeling the orgasm at all means that their experience on this matter may not apply to other women. 

That said, some women may get interested in sex, get aroused but not reach an orgasm (anorgasmia). Some women may have never had orgasm before (primary anorgasmia), others may have reached climax before but then develop the problem (secondary anorgasmia). For some, on the contrary,   they might reach climax only during certain types of sex such as oral sex. 

Women may experience difficulties reaching orgasm due to physical, emotional, or psychological factors such : menopause, medical conditions including diabetes, surgeries,  hysterectomy, consumption of anti-depressants, cultural or religious beliefs, shyness, guilt about enjoying sexual activity, history of sexual abuse, mental health conditions  such as depression or anxiety stress, poor self-esteem, lack of sex desire, lack of exercise, smoking,  excessive alcohol consumption, sleep disorders and relationship issues being at the fore of causing anorgasmia.

Testimonials 

Grace Nakakande living in Kampala and mother of 4 children ,  told us that in 10 years of marriage she has not reached orgasm during sex. "My husband ejaculates immediately and we start the action but he is unable to prepare me physically or mentally.

This makes her more prone to headache and pain  rather than  to sex intercourse . She once talked to her husband and he said that he could not behave like a prostitute. She  decided to keep quiet because she did not want to make her husband suspicious. 

Another woman we interviewed ,Deborah Birungyi, asserted that many Ugandan  women  do not even know that a woman can reach orgasm. After two years of marriage she had never reached orgasm. At this point,she dared her husband and they started looking for the answer to the problem. They approached  a specialist  and other scientists and  learned a lot about sex ignored "

Deborah advised women  not to keep quiet when they have such secret issues because they can cause many problems like sexual diseases and even bring a couple to divorce. 

Jasmine Mugabi, an expert in gynecology  says that many women in Uganda and in many other African countries have  problems with sex. Many of them  have not yet reached  pleasure during sex.  In her opinion, this can lead to many problems including chronic headaches, abdominal pain and even domestic violence.   

Gloria Tumwebaze, a member of the Human Rights Commission of the National Women's Council , says that recent figures seem to suggest that at least one in ten women faces the challenge of not achieving lasting happiness during sex in Uganda.  She says that  the Commission has continued to educate many families  about the problem with the support of media. She also points out that their association has  started asking religious leaders to take the time to educate couples on social issues related to the happiness of the couples.